Sadness cracks the gloss of paradise lost when a friend dies suddenly. This week Cityview hosted the memorial service for Kenny Lim. Together we entered into the grief that his family, his neighbours, his workmates, and his church feel at having lost a man who shaped life with them. Kenny died in a swimming incident in Ontario on July 21st while on a family vacation; it was a dream trip across Canada suddenly and dramatically changed. I am finding that thoughts of his death and his life spring into my conscousness often these days.
Kenny was part of the original Gladstone group that welcomed me and Ellen to Vancouver. He was one of the group of four who were batized in our first year down at Locarno beach. A couple of years ago I got to be a part of baptizing his oldest daughter in the same waters with him. Two generations seeking to journey with Jesus and venture into His ways of peace. We were not untouched by the ebb and flow of faith and friendship.
I learned from Kenny the dogged pursuit of being present with your family as an offering of love for them. The conscious and deliberate choice to make "being there" with your kids marked Kenny’s life and I deeply respected him for it. Kenny helped me understand that "multi-tasking" should not necessarily be viewed as normal; I’ve become an adult in an age that thinks this capacity is a reflection of maturity. Kenny desired to be singular in his focus. He tried to make choices for learning and creative expression and the pursuit of these choices extended beyond a day, a week, a month, to years. The accumulative efforts made for a very interesting man.
To be surprised by death means that we might not really know just how much we are loved, respected, and appreciated. Perhaps we don’t know that in life, even when we see death coming. Most of us are not fully confident and at ease with ourselves to express such for others nor to receive it from those close to us. However, I have the confidence of knowing that in Christ now, Kenny does not "see through a glass dimly." Now his faith has become sight. Now he can fully experience the love and loyalty that God has expressed to him through Christ. Now his hope in the promise of Christ is fully realized.
But I am still surprised by death. Even though with Paul and the Scriptures I can agree that its "sting is gone because of Jesus’ resurrection," I am still surprised by the loss and the ensuing vaccum that demands a response: to mourn with those who mourn, to adjust my life to new realities, to take stock of my heart with God, to repent of maladjusted values, to rightly treasure the gifts of people that God has given me now.
